film

in the morning finding you well on a thursday you shit after me and we drink coffee on the bed and look out and men who fold their shirts and walk in the morning and were children once now play and golf are walking in the morning and we kneel across from each other near the window where he leans and masturbate and I cum in a cup the children I will no longer have close and I think but don’t say that once I saw a video on twitter where a gay man put a frozen vile of cum in his boyfriend’s ass and he fucked his ass until the cum had melted from ice 

and I take my ice millions of children are everywhere but mine are dropped into a brown cardboard box in a chamber between two doors 

and they are collected in full ppe 

pp

the penis 

of a woman 

the penis of a woman 

the cum of a woman makes children 

or is the children 

I can’t decide

and they are in a box 

waiting to sleep as we have just done 

and today

everything is the same colour 

the same two colours 

for the rest of your life 

cool is

letting people know you too

are performing 

as well 

and then 

to 

simply collaborate 

sexuality

we no longer hide the asking in irony 

the asking I mean of the world 

on the other side of the screen 

here 

actually

sometimes 

hopefully

everything depends on the sun 

because everything is that mood now 

as in mood at all , that’s what the sun is now 

how bad could it be then 

you ask in raging anxiety 

good luck taking control 

if that’s what you seek 

travel

when we buy the ticket to the other place we believe that if we could go and really settle in we could change the world somehow big world big world big girl outside in it the big world but the close one is so much easier to dominate to take control of what is close which is to understand its chaos as in control is rhetorical or pretend even 

I read the poem I read the poems again I read the poem and all I thought about was when are we going to the shops and I need to get that blood test finished the poem 

poem is trying to control 

that is why we cannot poem 

today 

i decide

to work just enough so i can buy the 

portable 8 track mixer 

which meant free love to me now 

it meant real freedom baby 

you are putting the drums onto the lawn 

crying no baby 

the lawn is soft and sun dry 

everything breathes people shout and laugh 

sun hardens backs of shirts 

crying baby 

the sun another one another one dreaming 

of movie movie movie life movie life movie 

movie it’s all alright movie it’s all alright movie 

it’s all alright movie it’s all alright movie 

baby 

and I would smile when someone I do not know walks through the door because 

that’s really all there is to do 

live 

but you are dreaming 

crying baby 

door 

more than anything 

playing on the stage 

every second 

until something catches you 

a fox 

a fever 

a disappointment